Talking about death is not easy, so it’s not surprising that many people have questions about the rites and rituals surrounding funerals and cremation. There are dozens of details that go into the final ceremonies of death. The way the deceased is presented should be representative of cultural, religious and personal style. Here are some things to consider when you have to decide what clothes to bury or cremate your loved one in.

What Clothes Are Appropriate for a Funeral?

Generally speaking, you can choose whatever clothes you want for burial and a viewing. You may want to talk to the funeral director for guidelines on what to include, but you can use anything from a formal tux or gown to pajamas. Many families choose to dress the loved one in a military or police uniform. It’s fine to use a favorite dress or sports team garment.  Usually, you don’t need to buy anything new, unless there may be fit issues.

The clothing does need to be clean and pressed for a nice presentation. The funeral home may cut the clothing in the back to aid in dressing and to create a better appearance for viewing. If you want the clothing back, just ask the funeral director. You may also want to include jewelry, eyeglasses and shoes. The funeral home should offer to give any valuables back to you after the funeral.

Religious or cultural influences may also play a part in what the deceased wears. In some cultures, the body is simply wrapped in a sheet after being prepared for the funeral. In the Catholic Church, it is common to dress the deceased in more formal clothing, as if the person is attending church. Casual wear might be seen as disrespectful. A Jewish man usually is wrapped in a shroud but will also wear a yarmulke.

What Clothes Should You Use for Cremation?

If your loved one is being cremated without a viewing first, you may not be as concerned with what the deceased wears. There are certain clothes that may not be able to be cremated because of safety and environmental concerns. You should discuss your clothing selection with the funeral director. In many cases, people are cremated in a shroud or funeral gown. Your funeral director can help you find one that is appropriate.

Things that may be not be cremated:

• Metal – no zippers or snaps  
• Rubber  
• Glass
• Plastic – no buttons
• Synthetic fibers

Natural materials, such as cotton or wool, are your best choices for cremation.  When in doubt, ask the funeral director.

Can You Choose Your Own Clothes?

If you have pre-planned your funeral services, make a note about what you want to be dressed in for your services. You could also discuss your choices with your spouse or next of kin — whoever would be responsible for planning your funeral. Some people even pack their burial clothes in a suitcase with detailed instructions. Helping your loved one plan your funeral isn’t morbid. It’s a gift you can leave for them because there are many details to attend to when someone dies.

Respect Your Loved One

Funerals are a difficult time. If you have to choose the clothing for your loved one, think about being respectful to that person’s memory. Don’t try to be funny. It may be sad to perform this duty, but this is one of the things you can do to leave a lasting impression at the funeral and to pay your respects. When in doubt, dress the person in clothing that might be worn to a funeral. It’s okay to ask the funeral director or clergy for help making a decision. They will have solutions for any of the problems you might face.