It's natural to want to be in a happy, fulfilling relationship. It's just as normal to have anxious feelings about the process of finding one. For many people, dating is just the obstacle they have to get past in order to get the relationship they want. You're more likely to be able to relax and make a better connection during a date that you enjoy, though. Here are some tips on not just getting through the evening but actually having fun in the process.

Know Yourself

The point of a date is usually to determine if someone is a good match for you. It's hard to do this if you don't know yourself or what you are looking for in a partner very well. No matter how much you like someone, you can spend a lot of time trying to make a romantic relationship work that was never going to be a good fit. Before you go out, reflect on a few basic questions:

• When do you feel the most confident? 
• What are your dealbreakers?
• How do you like to spend your free time?
• What qualities are important to you in a partner?
• What are your best qualities?
• How do you want to feel on a date or in a relationship?

True self-awareness is a lifelong pursuit. These questions, however, can help you prepare yourself not only for enjoying dates you have already planned but also for narrowing down prospects.

Create a Pre-Date Routine

The last thing you want to do on the day of your date is feel rushed or nervous. In addition to giving yourself adequate time to get ready, it's also a good idea to find ways to boost your mood before a date. Creating a pre-date routine helps you get in the right mindset for romance.

Your plan is not necessarily going to look like anyone else's routine. Make a playlist that reflects the mood you want to induce and test a few different activities before the day of your next date. Pick a time that you already feel relaxed so that you associate those feelings with the routine.

Develop Confidence-Boosting Strategies

No matter how relaxed you are at the beginning of your date, nervous feelings can pop up once you arrive. If you have a plan for dealing with nerves, though, there's no reason for them to derail the good time you are having. Sometimes it may be just as easy as taking a few deep breaths while the other person is talking. Just admitting that you're nervous out loud can dispel tension and may help put the other person at ease too.

It's important to listen to your gut. A few butterflies are normal, but if something the other person does or says makes you terribly uncomfortable, you aren't obligated to endure it. If you don't feel safe, it's perfectly fine to cut the date short and call someone you trust to meet you.

Lean on Your Support System

You already have friends and family who love you and want you to be happy. Don't forget to enlist their support. It's okay to ask friends to send you encouraging texts before your date to pump you up. If you don't seem to have a lot of luck in dating, you may want to discuss your strategies with a therapist or dating coach. They may have unique insight on how to update your online profile or help you overcome behaviors that are holding you back.

Finding someone who is compatible with you may take more energy than you expect. Once you start using strategies to actually enjoy your dates, though, the process will likely seem easier.