For many Christians, the loss of a loved one is followed by an endless stream of platitudes. Since death is viewed as a transition, there are plenty of comments about how the deceased is “in a better place” or “with God now.” While these come from a place of care, they can also come across as hollow, unhelpful, and, in some cases, outright hurtful. 

As younger generations care more about mental health, there have been a variety of shifts in how Christians approach grief. Since losing a loved one can actually cause serious trauma, what is said to the bereaved is crucial to their stability. Take a look at these points to see how Christian youths are handling the topic of death.

Removing the Platitudes

The well-wishing and apologies that follow someone’s death can become white noise fast. However, the comments that are repeated the most tend to stand out. A perfect example of this is telling the person who is grieving that “everything happens for a reason and this is all God’s plan.” By saying this, you are basically telling the person that God wanted their loved one to die. If this is said to a parent who lost a child, it will never be received the way it is intended. 

One way younger Christians are fixing this issue is by avoiding these generalities and euphemisms about death altogether. Instead, they ask questions about the deceased and allow the bereaved to tell stories and connect with the memories of the one they lost. Not only does this aid in the grieving process, it takes the pressure off of you to say something “helpful” and gives you the opportunity to learn more about the person who passed. 

Nixing the Idea That Suffering Is Important

Another point that some Christians tend to bring up is that “suffering is a part of life.” Again, this is a comment that is steeped in the teachings of the Bible, yet completely misses the point. Though the story told in “The Book of Job” in the Bible involves the titular figure incurring immeasurable losses at the hands of God to prove his faith, it is not meant to act as an example of God’s desire to cause suffering in humanity. By suggesting that it is a test of faith, you may actually push the person further away from God.

Death can shake a person’s faith to the core. There are countless stories of people who left their religious beliefs behind after suffering a major loss. Younger Christians are trying to avoid this entirely by being present and helpful when someone loses a loved one, as this helps to keep the bereaved in the congregation and turning to God for guidance.  

Showing Their Feelings

Though this is more cultural than religious, younger Christians are allowing themselves to show more emotion around death. For many years, there was a belief in the Western world that showing sadness was a sign of weakness, especially in men. This caused generations of men to repress their emotions, leading to endless mental and spiritual issues. After witnessing their fathers and grandfathers suffering without reason, younger Christian men are more likely to cry or express deep sorrow when a loved one dies. 

Not only is expressing one’s emotions important for the individual, it is also vital for the collective. Christianity is all about community. When everyone mourns together openly, it makes it easier for people to cope with the loss and know where to turn for strength and support. 

Changing the Game

Though grief is complicated, one’s religious beliefs should not make matters worse. By adopting new attitudes toward death, young Christians are revolutionizing the way many people view loss.