Most couples enter an engagement knowing that the costs of a wedding are significant. Thankfully, a majority of people will not need to foot all of the bills alone. According to tradition, certain members of the wedding party or close relatives of the couple are meant to pay for certain aspects of the event. While customs have changed significantly, it can be useful to examine these traditions. Whether you’re looking for ways to break up the expenses or you’re simply curious, learning more can add perspective to your journey.
Why the Traditions Have Faded
Wedding trends come and go for countless reasons. What was customary just a generation back may no longer hold up to modern sensibilities. A big example of this is the legalization of same-sex marriage on a federal level. Though members of the LGBT community were able to wed in specific states, this new protection opened the gates and allowed people all over the nation to finally wed the ones they loved. Since many customs were heavily reliant on archaic gender roles, however, it meant that these couples could not simply follow the same traditions of straight couples.
This can be quite apparent when it comes to the breakdown of pay. The mundane back-and-forth of “groom’s family pays for this” and “bride’s family pays for that” does not work for same-sex couples. Keep this in mind while looking over the breakdown of traditional payments, as this will need to be adjusted if your relationship falls outside of the heteronormative standard.
The Biggest Expenses
Typically, the most significant costs related to a wedding are connected to the venues. Both the space where you will be married and the spot where you will be celebrating need to be booked far in advance. From the deposit to any additional fees, you need to have a good chunk of change ready to go for these investments. Tradition states that the family of the bride pays for the ceremony venue, while the groom’s family covers costs connected to the reception space.
For LGBT couples and those looking to step away from traditional gender roles, these expenses can still be easily split between the families of the couples. Naturally, you can make alterations to this breakdown should one expense prove more costly than the other and you wish to even the playing field for the loved ones helping you out.
The Preliminary Events
A wedding is only one of the many events connected to a marriage. From the engagement party to the shower to the bachelor and bachelorette events, some couples like to milk this time as much as they can. Since this can be expensive, some customs have developed to split the payments among various family and friends. Typically, the couple or their immediate family members will pay for the initial engagement celebrations. Similarly, bachelor and bachelorette festivities are covered by the members of the wedding party.
Optional events are sometimes put together as a surprise for couples. Showers are a perfect example of this, as these are usually thrown by friends who want to show some love and take part in the joy.
The Odds and Ends
There are countless expenses connected to a wedding. Thankfully, there are also just as many ways to cover the costs when you know how to get creative. With the honeymoon, couples can consider asking for direct donations from guests via their wedding gifts. Decor can also be a good place to ask for assistance, as friends and family can usually easily chip in for small decorations or contribute to floral arrangements. Think outside the box to discover some very useful ways of handling the expenses.
Traditions surrounding weddings might change frequently, but it seems these events always remain consistently expensive. Whether you are a couple who like to defy custom or you’re a member of the LGBT community, it can be a good idea to look at different options in order to find a payment structure that helps you pull off your dream event.